HNT: In my bed

The nightmask is classic, right? So Blanche Deveraux!

So, it's no surprise to anybody following me on Twitter (@Westopher) but I got a new bed!

This is my first new bed in Los Angeles. I've been out here a pretty long time, most of my adult life actually. It was long overdue. Plus, I have got to get rid of all this old shit.

I'm so tired of all these weird odds and ends I've collected over the years, chest of drawers that don't match, things that aren't really in use, overcrowded artists table as a desk...as I keep telling you, I'M A MESS!

The benefits of a good night's sleep should be pretty obvious, as I'm sure you've all had a night without rest. The next day is a surreal zombie land of hellish proportions. The healthy part was like no doy. I had every reason to do it and now is the time.

Getting the bed itself was easy. I knew exactly what I wanted, walked in, pointed, paid the bill. It was great, until the delivery drama.

Given a time frame as to when they guys would drop off my bed, it was reasonable that I might be home from work. They agreed to call when they were on their way in case I was still at the newsroom, so I could take off and meet them at my place. The delivery dudes called me from the front gate.

I got all PISSED and tore outta work, thankfully not mouth raping anybody or being rude (other than in an obvious frenzy which I suppose could be construed as total bitchery since I'm so high strung...I know how I come off even if the perception is incorrect). However I may have been perceived; the gentlemen were waiting at my place, really awesomely nice to me, and apologetic about not calling. I had a mini-freakout over nothing. Basically.

It was all in my head. My stress had level spiked needlessly. I really could have calmly told them I was on my way and relaxed on the drive over the hill, instead of cursing every car in front of me on the way. RAGE!

Obviously, I need to relax. That's when I snapped this picture, then took the best damn nap in a decade.

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday!

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Anger clutter?

Hold on I'm going somewhere with this...

While I'm riffing on my recent rage issues, I think it still fits with my new goal to get rid of old junk in order to do some spring cleaning. Think about it: a bad day is just some mental trash that needs to be tossed out.

So, in a way, our anger and frustration are things that fill our head space, emotional crap taking up invisible real estate in our minds, cluttering up our thoughts. We can push that junk out of the way and leave room for nicer things to blossom, like a mental rose garden. Pluck out those weeds and plant some inspiration seeds! *cheesy self-help saying of the day

By getting rid of that baggage, new things that piss me off aren't likely to set me into such a rage. There's more of a fuse, so to speak. Some room to work up to my head exploding, instead of a first reaction. That gets messy after awhile.

Instead of kill-kill-kill, now I'll try to think of gently maiming people.

Such a Monday

Monday blahs, amirite?

I really, really try, like super hard, to keep myself on a positive tip. I truly do. Yet all it takes is one little thing to completely derail me and I fly off the handle at everything. RAGE!!!

This week, let's focus on our anger issues, shall we? I'm going to work on ways to turn this around, but let's start off by letting it fly. What pisses you off? I have my own list below:

* Moron drivers in asshole cars. My dad loves this joke: Do you know what the different between a porcupine and a BMW is? A porcupine has pricks on the outside. p.s. GET OFF YOUR DAMN PHONE.

* HTC technical support. Like jumbo shrimp, this term is an oxymoron. Don't listen to those people; their answer to everything is "hard restart!" thus ERASING every single data point on your phone. I said STFUB and hung up. Don't do this, ever. It doesn't solve a running problem, it deletes all your stuff. This is an insanely lazy solution on their end that will completely screw you over; even knowing this I considered it until I remembered OH YAH I HAVE A BRAIN. If you're having an issue, isolate the problem -- you may need to uninstall and reinstall that application or run an update; not erase your entire phone. IDIOTS!!!

* Stupid, greedy sluts. You had me, then you wanted more...daring to ask if my friend gets in on the action. Obviously I need higher standards, because any right minded man would be totally satisfied with what I have to offer. Just like blackjack, this is a bust. To quote Pink, it's just you and your hand tonight.

* Time saving technology. Like HTC technical support, this notion is also a farce. Think of all the tech you have in your life; do you have more time to sleep in, more time to get ready in the morning, longer weekends? NO! That's because you're probably waiting for something to download.

* Multi-taking. Another oxymoron. All this does is delay everything all at once, instead of getting one thing done at all. Every single time I go into a store, checkout takes about 10x longer because rather than just stop, acknowledge the clerk and pay their bill, they're messing around with their email or a call. GET OFF YOUR PHONE. The rest of us don't care about your conversation and want to kill you. Dead. In the face.

HNT: A fresh start

Fresh! I wanted to express something simple and, well, clean this week. Yes, it's a (hot & less junky) theme going on lately.

As I continue to work on my book (with the same name as this blog) I continue to realize that the philosophy behind BB30 applies across the board. It is not about giving anybody 1-2-3 instructions, but rather developing a mindset that creates change. One of those ideas is that every day is a fresh start.

I will not always be able to make my daily goals, I will forget to do those things that have not become a habit (yet), I will fail to do the tasks at hand. This can create a self-defeating attitude, distress and ultimately throw off a good track record. I didn't do (insert whatever here)! I suck! Why try!

The thing is, sometimes life happens while you're trying to do other shit. I try to accept that. Whatever happened yesterday is in the past. Each day is a fresh start. I'm not suggesting we get to start all over again from scratch, only that we can begin the day without carrying over that gross, self-defeating baggage from the night before. It's a fresh start.

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday!

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Chad Ochocinco danced into my heart

Goodbye Chad Ochocinco! The NFL hottie was voted off 'Dancing with the Stars' last night, but we can still lust over his fine ass.

Since I'm on a cleaning kick (this week at least), we shall ignore the obvious phycially of this hot beast (p.s. he boxes) and get to the dirt. Here's a little blurb I wrote for ETonline about just that:

Being on one of TV's hottest shows clearly hasn't gotten to the football star's head -- considering he was snapped by Hollywood.tv doing his own laundry at a Los Angeles laundry mat.

"I'm the only star that dances that washes his clothes at the laundry mat," he told the photogs proudly.

Sure, A LOT of people do their own laundry. Sure. But most celebs don't even have to brush their own teeth. An assistant does it while they're in a drug-induced sleep. The fact that he does his own cleaning -- at a local laundry mat -- is fairly commendable. He knows how he likes his load!

For myself, I wash everything in cold and air dry my sexy chonies. I'm not very good at getting whites super white because I'm afraid of using bleach. I'm still traumatized from previous accidents that ruined perfectly good clothes.

More 'Dancing' hotties: Jason Taylor, Tony Dovolani, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, Aiden Turner

Oh and yah, you should take a dance class

p.s. You're welcome, Cogent Ascending!

I'm a mess

This is my junk drawer, you guys. Technically, it is ONE of my junk drawers. That’s because every drawer is essentially a junk drawer.

I have done quite a bit to improve my life; really picked myself up by the boot straps and climbed to new heights after hitting my personal rock bottom. Still, that does not change the fact that I'm a damn slob. Basically.

Thus, my place is kind of a mess, much to the dismay of my roommate. It's not like we're fighting about it but still, he used to clean on the regular and now he's more on my level. I think I broke his spirit. Why should he bother when I don't? The whole situation makes me sad, because I'd like to have a nice place.

So this is where the guilt comes in. I mean, here I am, preaching like some asshole about positive change when in fact I'm static in many areas of my life. It's time to follow my own message, start over again, and try new things to get myself on the proper path that I see myself on, rather than one covered in crap. I'm tired of living in my own filth. This is my secret shame!

The junk drawers are but one example (my closet and bathroom being others). Every single time I open one of those drawers, it occurs to me that everything is a mess and I spiral into a series of self-defeating thoughts about my inability to keep a clean house.

Except, no doy, it doesn’t have to be that way. In the same manner than I got myself off the party train, in the same way that I slowly cut out fast food, and using the same techniques to get my body in shape, so too can I develop a routine to replace my messy habits with neater ones.

I do not expect to be perfect, to enjoy cleaning, or turn into a neat freak. This is going to take work, effort and annoying stuff like that. It won’t be easy! Or, wait, will it?

One of the things that I think stops people from attaining their goals is effort shock. Like sticker shock, in which the buyer bulks at the price of an item, effort shock is the horrible realization of how much work it will really take to meet one’s goals. In the same way we’re all like, holy shit it takes 30 minutes on the treadmill to work off a damn cookie?!?, people can’t handle all the effort it takes to effect change in other areas. I am that people. I am also good writer and knows gramatics.

Effort shock is the very reason I believe in baby steps. Take one small thing, using the least amount of energy, and just fucking do it already.

So I cleaned one of my junk drawers. While getting ready to head out with my roommie (thankfully we’re like brothers or he would have killed me in my own mess by now) it occurred to me that I know his shower time. That is to say, I was already ready, with time to kill.

In the time it took him to get ready, I managed to clean out one entire drawer. It took about 20 minutes. It turns out that cleaning up my act doesn’t have to be that difficult, but it will probably be a long drawn-out process. Making small improvements over time versus no change ever is always BETTER (than nothing).

BEFORE

AFTER!

A new mission

Starting this website was an exercise to motivate myself and find an audience with my story. Through the years, it's been different things and I've had a different voice. Most recently I've been trying to expand my horizons and really make this a lifestyle destination. After all, the idea behind BETTER by 30 isn't just looking at hot guys or copying their fitness routines. This is a very gay guide to self-improvement, by example (because I still need improving too). So, I created a new mission statement (over there -->)

It reads:

After completely transforming my life from a pointless existence as an L.A. party boy to become a Hollywood player living my dream as an entertainment writer, I’m a spokesbitch for positive change. Life is a journey, being BETTER is not some endless pursuit of perfection, because none of us will ever be perfect. The philosophy behind BETTERby30 is that any of us, at any age or any stage, can go after the things we want in life. For me, I stopped eating fast food, gave up soda, and quit the after-hours scene. I started doing my fitness, eating organically and getting my beauty on; gaining 25 pounds of muscle and reversing the signs of aging. I left my dead-end job and became a pro writer (here, here and here). Sometimes I fear turning into one of those annoying fitness freaks, but I know you’ll put me in check, dear reader. Let’s keep it real. While literally being BETTERby30 is no longer my goal (because I turned 30 in 2006) the idea of being such is what began the journey and serves as the title of this blog is a reminder how it all started. I went from closet crackhead to living my dreams; NOW WHAT? Read on...

Eye update

As mentioned yesterday, I've been having a flurry of blurry after not being in front of the computer last week and then working online every waking moment since Monday.

Was I going blind? I called my doctor to find out.

Given my recent nasal surgery and not using my eyes per regular, she said my strained vision was nothing unusual. I will see her again in two weeks to make sure everything is good. Her suggestions:

Make sure you computer monitor is below eye level. Our eyes generally read easier at a downward angle, rather than looking up.

Take breaks & close your eyes for 10 seconds. I guess everybody knows this once, but DO YOU DO IT? There is all this stuff that we're supposed to do but unless I'm setting some kind of alarm on the hour, it may be hard to get in the habit of this one.

Exercises like the "floating hot dog" are fine. If you missed it, the floating hot dog was in yesterday's video exercises. These won't do you any harm, according to my doc, but they're not as important as taking simple breaks.

I sort of see what you did there

I've been having major eye stress this week, you guys. I think it was taking all that time off for the surgery and not really using my peepers except to watch 'Dexter' seasons 1-3. Now that I'm back in front of the computer 24/7, it's like forget it Jake, this is Blurry Town. Here are some eye exercises I did once this morning and then neglected the rest of the day because I'm JUSTTOOBUSY. But hey, since we're all in front of the computer let's all take a moment and do these now, yes?

Hot bitches on a boat

Luis Figo, Matthew Fox and Eric Dane on a commercial shoot, showing off their hot shit.

As it so happens Eric Dane & I go to the same gym in Hollywood. It's not like he's my BFF, but from meeting him he strikes me as a very laid back, casually cool kind of guy.

"Going to the gym and looking for a specific result is a short-lived existence, as opposed to going to the gym and adopting it as a lifestyle. Develop a routine, because it's much harder to break it if you have one. If you have no routine, you have nothing to break, so discipline goes out the window," he says.

How does Matthew stay fit?

"I've never had a trainer," he tells BestLifeOnline. "I just work out on my own, and my workouts are incredibly simple. I don't lift weights -- I played football for so many years that I guess I just got really, really tired of being in a weight room.

"So, for me, exercise is about aerobic exercise. I run and road bike on my Trek. I try to do a minimum of 30 minutes, but a lot of times I'll do a 20-minute run and a 20-minute bike ride.

"Whatever it is, I gotta make sure that I get at least 30 minutes of aerobic exercise three or four times a week. When I run, I try to do about 4 miles, but I go really slowly. I think people stress out about distances, when it's the amount of time that's important.

"You can be going quite slow, but as long as you're going for half an hour or more, it's cool. One of the things I've been trying to figure out is how I can actually spend more time exercising with the schedule I have.

"I love to work out early if I can, because I feel better for the rest of the day when I've gotten it out of the way. I feel refreshed and get that feeling everybody has after they've been working out, which is, ya know, good.

"See, exercise to me is more about how I feel. If I don't exercise, I get edgy: I feel like I have too much energy and I need to put it somewhere. So, exercise is more of a stress-related activity for me."

"I absolutely love food. My wife is Italian and a phenomenal cook so I've been really fortunate to go this far without having to get more serious about a diet/exercise combination. It's always been about exercise for me, because I've pretty much always eaten what I want. I mean, I have a real sweet tooth for ice cream and homemade pie, so I try to curb that as much as I possibly can.

"But now that I'm 40, I am paying more attention to how much and what I eat than when I was 20. I've been doing some reading up on raw foods and how good they are for you. One of my favorite things in the world is to have over-easy eggs and a thick slab of bacon and toast in the morning -- and I will still totally do that, occasionally. But I like to try to adhere to eating only fruit until lunch. And I love coffee, so I drink a couple cups a day, too.

"Today, I've eaten some shredded wheat and raw almonds for a snack and, tonight, I think I might have sushi with my wife. Since I've been living in Hawaii, I have gotten to absolutely love sushi."

Cory Monteith: Shirtless & homoerotic

Adorkable Gleek Cory Monteith donkey punches 28 today. Here's an early welcome to my box, stud.

According to my friends at FitCeleb, dude's been working hard to keep the pudge at bay. He's reportedly been spotted with his trainer at Gold's Gym in Hollywood doing jumping jacks and pushups to get himself in shape for upcoming episodes of the show.

That's the same gym I do to, where Eric Dane and other Hollywood hotties hang out, but I've yet to see Cory. You know where to find me in the meantime.

Did you know that before 'Glee,' Cory started as a jock sniffer in the homoerotic thriller 'Killer Bash'? True story!

Images thanks to SquareHippies

New & Improved!

My new nose! You guys! OMG! Yah, I know. Its not much different than my old nose (as seen here).

There is still a little swelling that will go down in the next few weeks.

I'm gonna be Captain Obvious and admit these images are majorly color corrected (and one of them looks a little out of focus). I'm not a professional self-portrait taker over here. Thanks to the surgery, here's something I am -- a former mouth breather! No longer am I teetering on the brink of hyperventilation. Air flow is a good thing.

While recovering, I could not wear my reading glasses so I didn't get online the entire week. That was major. The Internet is pretty much my life; where I work and play. I might go mental (ok, even more mental) if I ever have to do that again.

Thankfully my BFF gave me the first three seasons of 'Dexter' on DVD on my birthday, which I watched in its entirety. My eyes are only bad up close, so TV was (and is always) my friend. Turns out a show about a serial killer only further endeared me to those who violently punish wrongdoers, no matter how fucking psycho the notion seems. I mean, some people (fictional or otherwise) really have it coming.

During my time on the couch, I learned a few things, like how to sneeze out of my mouth. I was in so much pain I wouldn't have considered otherwise. The bitch of it all is that I still can't blow my nose, which is the only thing I've wanted to do since the surgery.

Gross moment! When they cut up the inside of your nose they have to put splints up in there to seperate the two sides of the nasal passage. Otherwise they could swell up and stick together. When my doc finally took those out, they were as long as my pinky finger, covered in black crusty blood. It was disgusting and I had to share.

To anyone considering an elective operation: DO YOUR RESEARCH! While I was prepared in that I took time off work, stocked up on tissues and medication, plus had something to occupy my time; I had no idea I'd be so fucked up in the meanwhile.

The result, however, has already proven to be worth it. In my case at least it has been a dramatic improvement. Finally! I can breathe!